Depending on the relationship you have with your MIL you could take several different approaches. If you get along well and really trust her, you could sit her down with some coffee and explain that when you moved in with her you promised yourself that you wouldn't become to reliant on her assistance. While you value the roof over your head, you also cherish the time you have with your kids even doing the common everyday things like baths and dinner. Explain that you want her to spend time with the kids and build a wonderful relationship with them, and you are in no way ungrateful, but that right now, you really need to be their mother. Plan some ways that she could still help, without making you feel helpless. Perhaps a weekly "date" with each child or one night a week that she did bath and bedtime, just something you could plan around. Of course, not everyone has that kind of relationship with his or her MIL! If your husband could get that kind of talk in with her that would be even better since it is his mother. I'm guessing though that you aren't on the best of friendly terms right now and her assistance is belittling and driving you mad. In that case I suggest staying VERY busy. When she starts to swoop in to take over, change gears and cut her off. If she starts to fill the bathtub, you grab the kids and the towels. If she starts planning an outing, grab the kids and the diaper bag and tell her you're sorry but she can't take the kids because you are going out. Try to be flexible where you are comfortable because the kids will benefit from a relationship with her, but don't allow her to push you out of your role as the children's mother!